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Sidekick and Other Songs

by Hello, The Future!

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1.
Sidekick 01:58
Do you want to be my sidekick We could have some fun Come on won’t you be my sidekick I wouldn’t take just anyone And I hope that you say That you’ll come with me adventuring I’ll save the world and you’ll save the day ‘Cause I love you If you were my little sidekick We could have some fun In the morning I’d make you omelette And then you’d help me get work done You see, I’m kind of a mess Unless you’re there to galvanize me Don’t know why; I guess it’s Cause I love you And I know You love me too I know You love me too Do you want to be my sidekick? We could have some fun Come on won’t you be my sidekick I like you the best of everyone And as soon as you say That you’ll come with me adventuring You’ll pack the bags, I’ll take you away ‘Cause I love you
2.
That Tractor 05:30
I took my tractor And I took my roomba And I took my screwdriver And went out to the back With my husband waiting upstairs Playing Xbox He won’t miss the screwdriver He won’t know I’m not back I tried, though I tried to make a robot I tried to make a robot A robot But Halfway through the bourbon When I turned the keys And started up the tractor With the roomba parts inside And my smartphone open Showing Wikipedia’s Page for “robotics” There was nowhere I could hide When that tractor That old and rusty tractor That old familiar tractor That tractor My… I tightened a screw Its part skipped a beat I took off my gloves And put my hands upon the steering wheel So I could feel it close to me It started to move I went for a ride And somehow I knew what it felt inside And it was more than I could have ever dreamed of I thought I built a robot, but That tractor learned how to love I took that tractor And we roamed our fields And then he said he loved me With the blinking of his eyes And we woke my family And we woke my neighbors And they saw that tractor And they blinked back in surprise They said “Darling You know you built a monster What’s worse, a sentient monster A monster!” And then that tractor said “I’m not a monster And this girl is mine. We belong together; Yes, our hearts have gone through the combine.” At least that’s what I think he said I may have been distracted By the way the people looked at me And the way the crowd reacted To my tractor! [INSTRUMENTAL BREAK] When they took my tractor I might have gone insane I mean just for a moment But I guess that’s all it takes. Now I take the pills Because they take the pain Because they make me take them I guess that everyone makes mistakes. I’ll rebuild him Someday I will rebuild him Some way I will rebuild him Rebuild… I will buy a tractor And I’ll buy a roomba And I’ll buy a screwdriver And go out to the back. With my children playing upstairs Making messes They won’t miss their dinner They don’t know I won’t come back ‘Cause I love him And though I must remake him I know that he’ll still love me He’ll love me He’ll love me He’ll love me And we’ll be together forever Just me and my tractor ‘Cause I tightened a screw It’s part skipped a beat I took off my gloves And put my hands upon the steering wheel So I could feel it close to me It started to move We went for a ride And somehow I knew what it felt inside And it was more than I could have ever dreamed of I thought I built a robot, but That tractor learned how to love
3.
When we were kids we played all kinds of games Ninja Turtles, anyone that we Wanted to pretend we were, we’d be Mom or Dad, or Barbie, or the Red Mage in Final Fantasy Harry’s got a wand, MegaMan’s blue [and cyan] Grab the clothes and do what they would do [‘cause we can] We’d become whatever we wanted to Life is just the same You don’t have to go out into the woods to play You don’t have to make a suit of chain-mail armor to play I mean if you want to make a suit of chain-mail armor, that’s okay But here’s my secret to you, the world already works this way So come along and sing with me! Life is a LARP! Just think of all the stuff you did today Wake up and put on your fancy clothes Blow the snot out of your fancy nose Practice punctuality and go where responsible people go Maybe you don’t have to fight a Slime But you’d better get to work on time Make sure that your output better shine And you are on your way The other side is that whatever you want to do You grab the role and suddenly the work comes true You want to climb a mountain, got to buy the shoes All you gotta do is just be brave enough to choose So come along and sing with me! Life is a LARP! And I’ve become a rockstar I’ve become a geek rockstar Yes, I’ve become a rockstar And I have the EP to prove it How about you? I know you think you’ve rolled and got your stats You’re already good as you can get You can’t be what you haven’t been yet Anything you want to do has some prerequisite you haven’t met Or you might say that you don’t have enough. Better roles come to people with better stuff. I say that it’s time to level up You work at where you’re at And every day try on the stats you want to play Grab the rule book, learn the rules, and start to play You’ll find that what you want isn’t so far away As long as you work at it Consistently and with focus Watching for opportunities And learning about the other players Connecting with the community And don’t forget to practice EVERY DAY So one more time, come sing with me! Life is a LARP!
4.
Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and pirates Monkeys and robots and monkeys and pirates Pirates and monkeys and robots and pirates Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and ninjas Monkeys and robots and monkeys and ninjas Pirates and monkeys and ninjas and robots and Pirates and monkeys and ninjas and robots and Pirates and monkeys and ninjas and robots One ninja took out a shuriken I think this story's going to end with someone losing an eye again One of the pirates took out an eyepatch One of the pirates put an eyepatch on a monkey Isn't it nice that there's always someone around to help out a monkey? Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots Monkeys and robots and monkeys and robots
5.
A year from now, I’m going to be more famous. You wait and see. You’re going to have heard of me. Picture a day in March 2012. The world didn’t end. It’s spring! And I am in my apartment practicing. Come take a look into the future with me. I’ll share With you what life would be like If I were there If you were there What would the world be like if we were there Every day I’d wear a pair of baggy jeans The kind they made when I was in high school With that loop you put your hammer through And every day I’d wear a shirt with words on it Or some design That was made by a friend of mine And I’d send him an email and say “I’m gonna do a show You wanna play along? We could totally duet on this song” Hello the future. And I’d make a little money using Amazon ‘Cause people would care what I liked And they’d want to go and buy it But I’d make most of my money selling T-shirts and concert tickets And downloads of all my albums and songs And they’d play on college radio And wherever I went, people would go Hello the future. I’d have my own business And I would be successful I would be an entrepreneur Every other month I’d teach an online course on strategic planning And every other month I’d go on tour And you know that I’d get to play at w00tstock Because I’d rock And that’s where rocking people play And I would be invited to make records for DFTBA Yes that would be an awesome day And I’d give back to the world In every way I could I would use my powers for good Hello the future. I’d man my booth at cons And I’d meet up with Team Awesome We’d have Donut Parties for sure Every other month I’d teach an online course on strategic planning And every other month I’d go on tour And then the New York Times would write about me Because I’d seem Like a Manic Pixie Dream Girl And then Chris Guillebeau would ask me to guest post On his EBK Because I’d made my own way A year from now Please, a year from now Help me make it happen somehow Hello the future. A year from now, I’m going to be more famous. You wait and see. Hello the future.
6.
When we were kids we played all kinds of games Ninja Turtles, anyone that we Wanted to pretend we were, we’d be Mom or Dad, or Barbie, or the Red Mage in Final Fantasy Harry’s got a wand, MegaMan’s blue Grab the clothes and do what they would do We’d become whatever we wanted to Life is just the same You don’t have to go out into the woods to play You don’t have to make a suit of chain-mail armor to play I mean if you want to make a suit of chain-mail armor, that’s okay But here’s my secret to you, the world already works this way So come along and sing with me! Life is a LARP! Just think of all the stuff you did today Wake up and put on your fancy clothes Blow the snot out of your fancy nose Practice punctuality and go where responsible people go Maybe you don’t have to fight a Slime But you’d better get to work on time Make sure that your output better shine And you are on your way The other side is that whatever you want to do You grab the role and suddenly the work comes true You want to climb a mountain, got to buy the shoes All you gotta do is just be brave enough to choose So come along and sing with me! Life is a LARP! And I’ve become a rockstar I’ve become a geek rockstar Yes, I’ve become a rockstar And I have the t-shirt to prove it How about you? I know you think you’ve rolled and got your stats You’re already good as you can get You can’t be what you haven’t been yet Anything you want to do has some prerequisite you haven’t met Or you might say that you don’t have enough. Better roles come to people with better stuff. I say that it’s time to level up You work at where you’re at And every day try on the stats you want to play Grab the rule book, learn the rules, and start to play You’ll find that what you want isn’t so far away As long as you work at it Consistently and with focus Watching for opportunities And learning about the other players Connecting with the community And don’t forget to practice EVERY DAY So one more time, come sing with me! Life is a LARP!

credits

released May 24, 2011

Thanks to Sidekick affiliates Adam Tannir, Robert C. Roman, Travis Surber, and Mike Knauer!

AND HUGE THANKS to Neil Fein, who recorded the EP in his awesome studio.

Excepting the "kitchen table" track, all audio recording by Neil Fein.

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Hello, The Future! Seattle, Washington

My name is Nicole.

My band is Hello, The Future!

I am the only person in my band.

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